In my last post I mentioned having a conversation with my great aunt where she spoke about moving her family up north for more opportunity, but consequently less unity.
Untie said when we had less she felt rich; every need was met and the sense of family was unbelievable. She spoke about family supporting each other and we didn't have the sense of "me and mine" our family is deeply entrenched in now. If someone was struggling or going through a situation, we banned together no question. She said there were times there was four to a bed, two at the head and two at the foot; I imagine these weren't king sized beds either.
I've also had countless conversations with friends in their 30's and 40's, who equally grew up without much, but talk about the "yest er years" as if their best days are behind them. I hear memories of growing up in neighborhoods where store bought toys were limited, but rich imaginations, a plethora of friends and all the "outside" your body could handle was enough to keep a kid happy until "the streets light came on." Now most of my friends make a minimum of $60,000, one, two kids at the max, and more bored, dissatisfied and depressed as ever. Much better toys, but no one to play with!
What do you think? Can less be more? Do you think we have a habit of replacing people and relationships with things?
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To a certain extent that is true. It's like the old saying "Sometimes we work so hard to give are kids what we didn't have that we forget to give them what we did have."
ReplyDeleteCorrection the word are should be OUR kids. lol
ReplyDeleteOhhh! That saying is great - sums it up perfectly! You wrote, "to a certain extent that is true," is there anything specific you don't agree with?
ReplyDeleteThat was well put Shannea and Al. More money, more problems. You can't buy love or happiness. You grow up thinking, I'm never gonna be broke, I'm always gonna have x,y,z... And end up doing more damage than good.
ReplyDeleteI think I'm guilty of this. My child is 17 and doesn't know how to catch the bus, doesn't do any more than she's asked and doesn't know how to cook or do any of the things I did to help out when I was her age.
ReplyDelete4 to a Bathroom:
ReplyDeleteWe can have more than less, I believe that. We have a little house with one bathroom, it's off the kitchen, it's weird. Some visitors are horrified ~ why don't you add a bathroom?? You have teenagers! We've talked about it, we think about it. In the mean time we deal with it~ we interact about it, we have to share, we have to communicate (ok, get frustrated, raise our voices too!). It's interesting how folks simply say, that would never work for me, that would not be possible. I've thought the same thing and then catch myself remembering - you grew up in a house with 4 people and one bathroom, you have no bathroom scars. Shannea has brought up an example (she's so good at it), a question to think about, to really stop and think about what's important. I'm so guilty of running through the day, of switching to auto pilot that turns off the awareness I need to live in the present. Being present ~ that's important ~ just not too long in the bathroom please.
Yeah, I love it when people (me included) are quick to judge that someone is putting up with something they would never put up with. More tolerance would do most Americans a world of good.
ReplyDelete